Ask me anything! Answering all of your recent questions...

It's Q&A time! I've so enjoyed receiving questions from you over the past couple of weeks - please do ask away whenever you wish, helping make life easier is the core mission here at Ask Charlie so I'm always more than thrilled to advise where I can.

How do you keep motivated to stay on top of everything? Cooking, washing, kids etc!?

I think my motivation is if you don't do it, it just mounts up. There's nobody else that's going to do it for you! So you've just got to crack on dig deep, be a grown-up and just tackle it.

I find it so much easier to stay on top of everything. If you don't do the washing for a few days, it just builds and builds and builds, and then it's more of a challenge. So I like to do a little bit every day. Where cooking is concerned, batch cooking is the way forward. If you're going to cook something, make extra, and put it in the freezer. That way when you're busy or just not in the mood for cooking, you can pull something out and have a healthy good home-cooked meal.

How did you travel to Scotland recently?

We flew to Scotland with Easyjet and I thanked them at the end! As we were flying back, the service was excellent. I was a bit apprehensive about it, to be honest, I didn't believe we were going to get there! I thought it might be cancelled or goodness knows what, but it was so slick, so smooth and so easy.

We all wore masks. It's Easyjet's policy that the children wear masks as well once they're over the age of six and that was fine. You wear a mask from the moment you set foot inside the airport to the moment you leave apart from eating and drinking. Social distancing was respected, which was lovely. There were no queues or rushes to get on the plane. It was a really, really pleasant experience. And I thanked EasyJet for that because I wasn't anticipating it to be such a pleasure, to be honest. They got a big thumbs up from us!

Where is your cardigan from?

My cardigan is preloved from my friend Julianna Heale. It's Marylin Moore London, and I've got a few Marilyn Moore things and it's just so cosy and comfy. It's like my comfort blanket! I absolutely adore it.

Any gluten-free picnic ideas?

The first things that spring to mind to me are egg muffins, which are great for packed lunches and really great for picnics as well, followed by things on skewers. Roasted vegetables, meat skewers, fruit skewers, things like that alongside some lovely, lovely salads with some grains.

Advice for time management?

I talk a lot in my Efficient Home Course about time management. There is a whole section dedicated to it and there will be an efficient home course coming again in September - so I will be redoing it for those of you that are interested! We cover every aspect of time management, and I give you loads and loads of tips and advice.

I think the most crucial thing is to just plan your time. You can sit down on a Sunday and plan the week, or if that's too much just do it the evening before and write a to-do list of all the things that you've got to do the following day. You could even go one further and work them into different time slots as well.

Hopefully, that helps, but if you want to dive a bit deeper than my efficient home course in September will be perfect for you!

How do you get the energy to do it all?

Well, if I don't do it, nobody else is going to do it, which I think quite often! There are a few things I do regularly to give me more energy so I can crack on and do it. I start with workouts in the morning, which set me up for the day rather than make me feel more tired. I feel energized by them and it gives me the get-up and go just to crack on and do it. I feel so much better the fitter and stronger I am, it gives me more energy and it helps me tackle all the things I've got to do during the day.

The other thing that I do regularly is drink matcha tea, which I love! It's a green powder, it doesn't taste amazing, to be honest, but it's all right. I know that it's doing me good because I have so much more energy when I drink it. It boosts your immune system, increases your metabolism and does all sorts of incredible things! I've done a whole blog post on matcha tea and why I drink it. It is incredible. I drink it at least twice a day!

It's slow-release caffeine. So rather than giving you the highs and lows of other sources of caffeine, this just gives you a nice gradual lift.

How do you get black mould stains off white walls?

The first thing that you need to know about mould stains on walls is actually, walls need to breathe. They need to be aired. So make sure that the room is ventilated regularly, even in the winter! Air the room and let the walls breathe. That way you're less likely to have a buildup of mould. Trust me, I've grown up in old buildings!

If you do have a buildup of mould, then I can recommend HG Mould spray. It's excellent for tackling the black mould that you can get on walls. You can buy HD products from most good hardware shops, or you can get them online.

You could also use a little bit of household bleach and dilute it in water to use in a spray bottle which works quite well. Be careful using bleach and leaving it around for children to get hold of and spray.

How do you maintain a happy marriage whilst having three children?

Now, that is quite a question. I think if anybody tells you that their marriage is perfect and incredible and amazing, they're probably lying.

Marriage takes working at, it's not always plain sailing. There are highs and there are lows. And I think the most important thing is communication with each other - we're not mind readers. So we need to say how we feel, and if we are feeling down, if we're feeling a bit flat, voice that. Say, I'm not in a great place at the moment, be kind, be gentle to me, whatever it may be.

As a family, we have always been pretty strict about the children's routine. So they have gone to bed and then it's 'our' time in the evening. That time is for us as a couple and we can sit down, we can chat, we can spend time doing things together, talk about things.

We always eat together, which I think is a really, really crucial thing as a family. Either we're eating as a family of five or Simon and I are sitting down and eating together. Sometimes he'll come home for lunch and we will sit down and we will chat about whatever's going on. I think making time for each other during the week is important. So whether that's going for a walk and getting somebody to come and look after the children, whether that's having a date night, whatever it might be, make sure that each week you set aside some time to be together and to talk and to communicate. Or just to go and have fun and do something different and keep things lighthearted.

Always ask each other how your day has been, just make time and be thoughtful because I think if you're thoughtful and say "Darling, how was your day?" you're going to get a thoughtful husband, wife or partner back. If you are short and snappy, they're going to snap back.

You might not always feel like you want to be kind and loving, but actually, just take a step back and think, actually there's no point snapping. Maybe ask "Have you had a difficult day? Do you want to chat about it?".

I think communication is key, time together is key, make sure that your children respect that actually, you are a couple, and that you have time together as a couple in your relationship and that the children respect and understand that it is grown up time.

Always, always, always go to bed having apologised to one another and having resolved an argument. Don't go to sleep furious and cross with one another because then it rolls into the next day, and that is not a good idea. I think if there's something that's upset you, there's something that's bothering you, don't brood on it.

Talk about things. Sometimes I will call Simon in to sit down and have a chat with me and just say "can we just go and talk together about this" because actually, I need to get it off my chest rather than it becoming a much bigger issue. So those are my top tips on married life with children.

Do you have a skincare routine that you can share? And nail care – yours always look nice!

Thank you, that's sweet for you to say!

I love Tropic. Their smoothing cleanser is excellent, I use that and their toner. I cleanse, tone and moisturise morning and night. I wear SPF 50 on my face every single day. Tropic also do a beautiful bamboo cloth that comes with the cleanser. I get excited about washing my face because their cleanser is just the most beautiful thing! I think cleansing, toning, moisturizing is essential. I'm not always so hot on the eye cream, which I need to be because the wrinkles are coming, but I do it when I remember!

For nails, I use Essie gel. The colour I'm wearing in the video is 'Woven With Wisdom'.

I probably do my nails once, maybe twice a week. The Essie gel is pretty long-lasting, and I use a base coat and a topcoat. And again, I have done a YouTube video about my nails and what I use and what I do. I just feel like I've got my stuff together if I've done my nails nicely! It takes seconds, but actually, it really elevates your mood.

I'm also taking Clean Body Company supplements. I take Omega-3 and Clean Collagen Ultra, which I swear by actually! It's been really, really great for hair, nails and skin. I've been taking these supplements now for a good six months and have noticed a difference in my overall wellness.

Who is your favourite fashion icon?

I find this quite difficult! I'm just going to go with the names that pop into my mind first. The number one person would be Lee Radziwill, Jackie Kennedy's sister. She was so unbelievably stylish and spot-on every single time. I look at pictures of her and think she's so effortlessly glamorous and sophisticated. Next up would be Audrey Hepburn, Coco Chanel and Olivia Palmero, who I think is just exquisitely beautiful. Lastly, I think my grandmother was so stylish, so beautifully dressed and elegant and sophisticated.

It was so lovely growing up watching her get ready. I was very close to her. She wasn't always an easy lady, but super, super stylish. I wear a lot of her things today - my necklace was my grandmothers and I've lived in it since I was 18. It's my absolute favourite. I feel pretty naked without it on! I do wear other necklaces, but I always go back to this because it's very sentimental as well. I get so many questions about it - Sam at New Clarity Jewellers in Petworth can make similar, so get in touch with Sam if you would like one!

What advice would you give to your younger self?

Coco asked me this question a couple of weeks ago. And I said to her, the first thing is that I wish I had studied harder at school and put in a lot more effort than I did academically. That is one big regret I have. And I think the other thing is not to worry about what other people think of you and just be your own person because it's boring if we're all the same! Don't follow the herd, just trust yourself and be happy in who you are as a person. Don't try and conform to fit in with everybody else or try and be something that you are not to please other people.

Can we have a tour of your children’s rooms? I need some inspiration for my daughter!

Gus has just had his 10th birthday and so his room is packed full. He's a real collector! There will come a time in the next year or so that we will need to make the room a little bit more grown-up for him. He chose the world atlas fabric on his curtains. He absolutely loves dogs and creepy crawlies and all sorts of creatures, so he's got this room packed full of all sorts! Including a huge polar bear statue which was a present from his Godmother! He collects special things that mean the world to him, I think it is really important that children have all of the things that they love around them. He loves cuddly toys and has got them all at the end of his bed. Whenever we go away, he always wants to take them all with him, which he can't!

I had these paintings for each of the children when they were born. They are quite special actually. His painting includes his name and date of birth, his time of birth, the name of the house, his brother and sister's names, Tess and Maude our little dogs, Pepper our labrador, and George the pony that we had then. I just think it's really, really beautiful and very special to have.

I think a children's bedroom should be full of their special things and their memories to have, but I know there will be a time in the not too distant future that we need to make this a little bit more grown-up for him.

I've had so much fun over the years, finding gorgeous things for the children. For instance a beautiful piece of art by Reece, a beautiful, beautiful illustrator of children's books. Another by Margaret W Tarrant, who again is a wonderful illustrator, I just adore her work. And lastly, a framed piece that was formerly a card from Gus's Godmother. I think it's really lovely for the children, they've grown up to see these really pretty pictures in their bedrooms.

Coco's bedside table is from Dragons of Walton Street and it's got the most beautiful Flower Fairy hand-painted on it, which is really sweet. Four of the pictures above her bed were from Simon's mother. I never met her, but I just thought they were gorgeous and lovely to have and keep, and actually, her bed was from Simon's parents as well, which is lovely. Coco's put led lights around the bed herself. There's also a piece of framed stitching that I made for Coco when she was born.

Alongside the Reece piece of artwork that all of the children have, Coco also has a piece by Molly Brett who is also another incredible children's illustrator. I think it's so fun and so gorgeous. Coco also has a desk in here, which she doesn't use as a desk, she uses it more as a chest of drawers, and then a little makeup/vanity area.

All of the children have got blackout blinds, which I recommend.

Round the other side of the room is her desk area, which was my dressing table. Coco is a complete and utter bookworm so she's got quite a few books above there and then another Molly Brett piece on the wall, which is covered with her rosettes and her special prizes that she and Cassie have won.

When you're thinking of decorating a children's bedroom, choose things that will last. She'll have this bed for years, and obviously, we can change up the pictures. We can paint it, we can do all sorts of things, but choosing neutral things such as curtains is a great idea as they are expensive! So choose something that will last quite a long time.

How do you deal with bickering children?

I think bickering children are the bane of every parent's lives, aren't they?

So if we are in the car, there is a couple of things that I do. The first thing is to turn some music on, to be honest! So if they are squabbling, I often find if I turn some tunes on and we have a sing-song, it distracts everybody, the mood lifts and they stop bickering. That works a treat. And that's been something that I have done for years and years and years. If that doesn't work, I stop the car and I refuse to drive until either they've stopped squabbling or they apologize to one another or apologize to me or whatever it might be.

Sometimes we will sit in the lay-by for 10/15 minutes. And if they're late for something, then they have to explain why they're late. I have done that a few times and that works incredibly well. I simply say it's dangerous for me to drive whilst this racket's going on!

At home, I just call them all down, we sit around the table and we say enough of this, what on earth is going on? What is the problem? Let's discuss it and sort it out. Normally, it will be something petty and I'm like, guys, is that a big deal? Come on, enough of this, go and sort it out.

I do try and let them sort things out amongst themselves, which I think is important, but sometimes you need to intervene. Lastly, the diversion tactic is pretty good as well with little children. Just remove them from the situation, change the scene, go and do something else.

Children will bicker and they will squabble! The dynamics with three children is interesting. If one of them is out of the situation the other two might get on better or vice versa. It's changing all the time, but I think just try and divert it, or if it's a big argument, sit down and say, come on, let's bash this out. Let's talk about this. Diffuse the situation as quickly as you can and move on to the next thing.

Where were you on holiday? Looked lovely!

We were in Aberdeenshire near the Moray Firth. If I was going to be a boy, which mum was convinced of, I was going to be Charles Moray after the Moray Firth. My parents spent their first years of married life up there. They met in Aviemore and we were sort of around that area. It's a beautiful coastline and really, really magical. Simon was at school in the area, we know it well, and we love Scotland. So we were having a trip down memory lane.

We stayed in Lossiemouth and we just explored all of that coastline. Coco is passionate about dolphins, so we went to the dolphin centre. It was quite windy while we were there, and sadly we didn't see any real dolphins, but it was just wonderful being up there and having a change of scene.

I am passionate about seafood, langoustine, in particular, so there were lots of langoustines enjoyed and fresh crabs and things like that! And I think the sea air is just wonderful for the soul, so we had lots of walks along the beach and playing in rock pools, which was great fun.

Do you have a good chocolate brownie recipe?

I do have a really good chocolate brownie recipe. It was mum's recipe and is utterly delicious. She used to bring a tin of chocolate brownies to visit us at school and we would enjoy those with our friends. Sometimes I wasn't so good at sharing, to be honest, and would keep the tin for myself!

Mum's recipe is in my afternoon tea recipe bundle, which is available in the shop right here on my website. The bundle is full of my favourite cake and afternoon tea recipes, scones, lemon drizzle, Victoria sponge and all those sorts of things.

What's your favourite summer salad recipe?

Oh my goodness. I just love, love, love salad. It's quite difficult to choose the favourites, but I think lettuce leaves with nectarine or peach, mozzarella and parma ham with some balsamic glaze drizzled over and a piece of crusty sourdough would be my perfect summer lunch salad to enjoy.

How did you know you were ready to have children (apart from being married)?

It was a little bit different for me because I was marrying somebody older, that didn't have children who really wanted to have children. Simon said to me, I want to get cracking straight away. I had fertility problems. My oestrogen level was low and I wasn't ovulating regularly at all. So before we got married, I started fertility treatment. We were keen to start our family as soon as possible, because that was the right thing for us, and because I knew that it might not necessarily happen overnight. And actually, it didn't, it took us a couple of years. Therefore I think my advice (and this is probably quite controversial) is don't wait until you think it's the right time, just get going with it because it could take a while.

These things don't necessarily happen when you plan. Sometimes they do, but sometimes they don't. Sometimes it can take years. I've got friends who waited to start their families and they had a really, really challenging journey. And in fact, some friends haven't been able to have children and that has been really sad for them. So I think my advice is don't overthink it, if you're in a secure, happy relationship crack on and go for it.

Do you have any “mum guilt” about working/not working/being available for your children?

Yes, absolutely. I don't know anyone that doesn't have mum guilt, to be honest. I'm just speaking for myself, but there are lots of times where I haven't been here and I've wanted to be here. I'm really lucky that I work from home so I can be around and be flexible and I can fit what I need to do around the children. That for me works well. I think I would find it harder on the mum guilt side of things if I was working for somebody else and I had fixed hours, although I think life might be easier because it would be less of a juggle.

So there is always mum guilt, I think, but it is important to take a step back and think, hang on a minute, why am I feeling guilty about this? It might be that you've missed miss their first steps, missed their first word. You're not there to pick them up when they fall over, whatever it might be, but you can't be there all the time.

I think it's important that children know that you have a life as well. And they respect that. My children understand that I'm working and I'm busy. And sometimes, if they want to go and do something in the holidays, they have to help me and then we can go and do that thing. So for example, if I've got a B&B turnaround to do, the kids will come and help me, we can get it done quicker, and then we can go off to the beach!

I think there is always mum guilt, but it's really important to explain to your children that you need to work and they can muck in and help too. Sometimes Coco will film some videos for me, or Archie will take some pictures and they are embracing that. So I have less mum guilt because I am involving them as much as possible. I think as mothers, we often feel guilty for things that we shouldn't necessarily feel guilty for.

I hope that you have enjoyed this week's Q and A! Thank you so much for reading and watching the video - sending you loads and loads of love, have a fabulous weekend and see you next week!

Love, Charlie x